Do you ever get lonely ?

[stueytrader]

Great question OP.

I think it might partly relate to whether you have a partner and/or family too. I do, both partner and two kids. That certainly gives me the connection I need to people when I want it, and also when I don't want it.

However, I have, despite my family, sometimes let friendships become less important also in my life. I'm not completely full time in trading though, and I think that could also be a factor here. I work part time employed, though I would not say I make any real social life from that, so maybe that doesn't really change much. I love spending most of my time in trading activity at the end of the day. If I was single, I probably would feel slightly lonely perhaps.

As Le Tiss said above though, it maybe is related to your personality anyway - I'm very happy with my own company too, have been for a long time.

I do think the idea of a traders' piss up (earlier on) sounds great though!

[alexmr2]

I'm only a newbie trader but I've worked in a socially enjoyable job, a socially horrible job and an isolated work from home job before. I imagine being a full-time trader is somewhere in the middle depending on your outgoing-ness and social circle/activities. You can do what you want when you want so if you have social activities to do then its much easier to arrange these around your trading than it would be for a lot of full-time jobs. If you are successful enough to make a decent income from trading then you are in a good financial position without the bounds that most highly paid corporate jobs have

For me nothing would be worse than my previous office job sitting down in someone elses office fixed hours 8:30-6pm 5 days a week with boring people that you don't like for low pay - that is truly wasting a chunk of your life

[TraderFred]

Sometimes I feel I’m gonna break down and cry,
Nowhere to go, nothing to do with my time,
I get lonely, so lonely,
Trading on my own.

Come on baby,

Sometimes I feel I’m gonna break down and cry,
Nowhere to go, nothing to do with my time,
I get lonely, so lonely,
Trading on my own.

Sometimes I feel the markets are moving too fast,
And everything is coming down on me, down on me,
I go crazy, oh so crazy,
Trading on my own.

Back, lay, drifter,
Back, lay, steamer,
I don’t have no time for no monkey business,
Click, click, red book,
Click, click, green book,

I get so lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely, yeah,

Got to be some good trades ahead......

[stueytrader]

For me nothing would be worse than my previous office job sitting down in someone elses office fixed hours 8:30-6pm 5 days a week with boring people that you don't like for low pay - that is truly wasting a chunk of your life

Agree with this, as a counterpoint to trading being a lonely, and wasteful, time. What we call 'normal' employment can certainly be that. I'm lucky that my actual employment is fairly autonomous and often from home also. When younger I once gained what seemed a great job, for money/prospects, and I completely hated it - because I was sat alone in an office most of the hours of the week. Now, that was lonely.

[brimson25]

I get lonely, but I've also worked in offices and felt very much like that.

There used to be trading rooms with fast pictures etc. I think they have all gone now.

[Trader Pat]

The solitude shouldn't be a problem as long as you have a life outside of trading and something to look forward to.

[Derek27]

Sometimes I feel I’m gonna break down and cry,
Nowhere to go, nothing to do with my time,
I get lonely, so lonely,
Trading on my own.

Come on baby,

Sometimes I feel I’m gonna break down and cry,
Nowhere to go, nothing to do with my time,
I get lonely, so lonely,
Trading on my own.

Sometimes I feel the markets are moving too fast,
And everything is coming down on me, down on me,
I go crazy, oh so crazy,
Trading on my own.

Back, lay, drifter,
Back, lay, steamer,
I don’t have no time for no monkey business,
Click, click, red book,
Click, click, green book,

I get so lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely, yeah,

Got to be some good trades ahead......

Excellent.

[ruthlessimon]

Is there an excuse to be lonely in 2018?

I reckon there's plenty of widows on Tinder gagging for it

[stueytrader]

There is another angle on this question, which is rather more about meaning in life I think. Trading can seem rather 'rinse and repeat' at times, maybe that leads to days which might seem a little nihilistic in nature? Not exactly the question of loneliness directly, but maybe meaning in life is related. As previously said, the answer is that there is plenty of life to explore away from trading, and it offers some good flexibility compared to other ways of living for sure.

[arbitrage16]

There is another angle on this question, which is rather more about meaning in life I think. Trading can seem rather 'rinse and repeat' at times, maybe that leads to days which might seem a little nihilistic in nature? Not exactly the question of loneliness directly, but maybe meaning in life is related. As previously said, the answer is that there is plenty of life to explore away from trading, and it offers some good flexibility compared to other ways of living for sure.

For me trading has always been about providing the financial component of an awesome life, allowing me to explore my other interests when and how I desire. Also, it is the perfect inoculation against much of the bullshit of modern life, that I found, in my former working life, was often created by other people, be that other commuters or colleagues at work who create bullshit situations for whatever reason.

At the high end trading can provide the kind of fuck you money that is true to that term. But even for a consistently profitable trader making £200+ a day, it provides a sort of fuck you money, because it allows that trader to bow in or out of the things that he hates or loves. The problem comes because people are conditioned, and institutionalised, so they don't appreciate the freedom that trading provides, instead getting caught up in the same negative behaviour patterns that create feelings of loneliness etc, which means they don't appreciate the freedom that profitable trading can provide.

[Kai]

I'd love to hear more thoughts and ideas on this subject.

So you've met loneliness - the archnemesis of freedom

I think it comes with the territory so I'd say it's pretty normal to feel like that. I am close to your age so I hear what you're saying, most traders are much older with families of their own so they never really get a chance to experience it. That's a very deep subject though, one could write a massive wall of text and barely scratch the surface. I think loneliness is sometimes the price you pay for that incredible freedom that comes with something like trading. If you think about it, absolute freedom could be the very definition of loneliness, the two are very closely intertwined.

Those of us who are still in our 30s and 20s often don't really know how to deal with that, we rarely know how to fully enjoy all the benefits of trading and we get too hung up on the negatives, it's just a state of mind. Not to be confused with loneliness, but there is joy in solitude and it can be very powerful for self-growth, I think you should embrace and enjoy solitude while you have it. You could easily miss it when it's gone, everything can change overnight and family life can get very hectic very fast.

In your particular case, it sounds like your life outside of trading gets lonely and you're trying too hard to overcompensate for that. Don't think you can fix that by making your trading more "social". Going to all the random social events that "you can get your hands on" can only make matters worse if you don't have a genuine connection with anyone there, when you start feeling alone around other people that's when you have a real problem. Perhaps your social life could use a bit more quality and a lot less quantity, luckily all it takes is just one very close person to change all that, a best friend or a partner.

Whenever one of my best friends starts feeling lonely or bored or disillusioned with life in general he goes travelling for a few weeks, alone, mostly to cheaper Asian countries which is part of his strategy. I don't want to say too much about his winning strategies for obvious reasons, but he uses a different kind of software called Tinder where his offers easily get matched, because apparently Asian girls really like white guys for the sole reason that he's not Asian. So he is currently exploring Indonesia in more ways than one for the 2nd time this year while I'm at home trading Leeds on a friday night.

TL;DR - Get on Tinder. Problem solved.

[LeTiss]

Is there an excuse to be lonely in 2018?

I reckon there's plenty of widows on Tinder gagging for it

Simon, you are indeed ruthless

[ShaunWhite]

Is there an excuse to be lonely in 2018?
I reckon there's plenty of widows on Tinder gagging for it

Simon, you are indeed ruthless

Where does 'widows' come into it? That's an insight into a preference that's tmi.
ruthlesssimon or desperaterooney ?

[Derek27]

Widows receive a life assurance payout!

[ruthlessimon]

Where does 'widows' come into it? That's an insight into a preference that's tmi.
ruthlesssimon or desperaterooney ?

If my grandad can get action at 80, anyone can

So long as you're happy with false teeth