Where are all the jokes?

[Derek27]

"Dad, how come my sister is called Teresa?"

"Because your mum loves Easter and it's an anagram of Easter"

"Thanks Dad"

"No problem Alan"

[Derek27]

A Finnish forward scored a goal.

[sniffer66]

A bear walks in to a bar and says "I'd like a...........,.............. beer please"

Barman replies " Why the big pause?"

"No idea, I was just born with them"

[ANGELS15]

A man walks into a chippy and says 'I'll have fish and chips twice please', the guy in the shop says 'it's alright I heard you the first time'.

[ANGELS15]

A circus manager is auditioning for new acts. He sees the regular acrobats, fire breathers, jugglers etc. He's not impressed and he puts up a sign saying 'wanted new and unique acts'.

The next day a guy turns up, the manager says' what can you do?' The guy says 'I can sing tunes out of my backside'. Intriguged the managers says 'go ahead'. The guy pulls his trousers down sits on the wastepaper basket and does a big shit. The managers says 'what are you doing?' The guy said 'even Pavorotti had to clear his throat!'

[Dr Ginhog]

" I Could walpaper your hall through your letterbox"
Trust me Im a Doctor

[superfrank]

https://vocaroo.com/1fHn2qUzEt6o

[paspuggie48]

https://vocaroo.com/1fHn2qUzEt6o

LMAO !

[jamesg46]

https://vocaroo.com/1fHn2qUzEt6o

[jimibt]

“It all starts innocently, mixing chocolate and Rice Krispies, but before you know it you’re adding raisins and marshmallows – it’s a rocky road.”

[Trader Pat]

A man walks into a bar with a roll of Tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please... and one for the road."

[sniffer66]

A man walks into a bar with a roll of Tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please... and one for the road."

Not someone to argue with. I've heard he's a total cyclepath

[Trader Pat]

A man walks into a bar with a roll of Tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please... and one for the road."

Not someone to argue with. I've heard he's a total cyclepath

[paspuggie48]

Someone just posted a comment on the BBC after Chelsea's win...

"Noel Gallagher where are you...??"

The best response was: -

"All the lights that lead him there are blinding"

[alexmr2]

If we've learned one thing from the Discovery channel, it's that all of our ancestors were skeletons that lived underground